Uk To Make Dotty Old Man King In Bizarre Got/lotr Style Ceremony. Yes, It’s The Coronation.

Bugger! Schoolboy error! At least you know I'm not Nicholas Witchel (thank God!) Ha ha!

 

They chopped his head off 400 years ago mate. He's not coming back from that.

 

Run it off?

 

Contributor to BBC News emphasising how important it is for man who lives across nine castles and palaces to ‘continue’ to live a normal life.

 

Uh oh, he's back, ready to harvest another soul:

 

He's not impressed with this.

 

Worrying times over at the Palace as Kate goes missing and conspiracy theorists fill the void. And now today the official account of the royal Death has posted this on X:



Marmalade presumably a code word for blood…

 

The fuss over this bloody photograph is ridiculous. The world's gone bleedin' mad

 

World scrutinises every detail of woman’s appearance and body. Is shocked to find this results in an eating disorder.

 

Source?

Genuinely had no idea this was even being suggested.

 

Thanks to this photo the internet has an influx of budding (pun intended) horticulturists wishing to discover when chlorophyll occurs in certain plants in the Berkshire region.

https://x.com/chrisshipitv/status/1767188085148618920?s=46&t=dJMeIix2oCIhjphLJhwpfg

Their enthusiasm is so great I’m going to register the website OnlyFerns as my own

 

It’s a good point, tbf. Nothing in my garden is this leafy yet and I’m in a milder part of the country.

 

Lots of leaves in my garden. You’re doing something wrong m8.

 

Pick them up then. You can make leaf mould out of them.

 

Mmmm. Leaf mould.

 

What's Kate up to now? Or is this one of the kids? We deserve to know!!

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c03rnr3qrj4o

 

IS attacks ain't what they used to be.

 

Probably being chased by paparazzi.

Too soon?

 

Oof.

 

Plus he's got the 'Most Evil Bitch That Ever Drew Breath ' for a sister-in-law

 

Didn't have you you down as so invested in the royal family