Your most embarrassing moment at school?

Anybody have anything they'd be willing to share online anonymously?

When i was in year 8 someone pulled down my trousers in front of the whole class and I cried, and in year 9 someone with learning disabilities tried to touch my c**k under the table and i cried.

Also in year 5 on a school trip, they tried to feed me pizza but I don't like cheese so I cried, and that was the very same day they were filming it to show to next years students who were going on the trip the following year.

Anyone got any good stories from school?

 

Hahaha! Why do you end up crying all the time?!

 

I'm sensitive. When one summer my mum took me to this sports camp, i chose to play tennis in the morning and the afternoon and all the other boys did football in the afternoon and i cried because i was surrounded my girls. Must've been 6 or 7.

One time I cried when a vicious monkey bashed the bars loudly at a zoo. I hope that monkey is dead.:rant:

 

Oh God. You sound like a nightmare child haha. I know I was a sensitive chap when I was little, but you clearly took it to the extreme haha.

Surrounded by girls at 6 or 7? LAD

 

It was scary! Have some empathy!:dismay:

 

You have said some ridiculously funny things on here over the years Simms but I think that this sentence and the mental images that it conjures up just about trumps them all.

 

Scared at the realisation of the amount of power he could wield when it comes to girls? LAD.

 

WTF? Is it too late to put this in the end of season awards?

 

This thread was meant for people to post their own embarrassing tales. Not critique me for mine.

 

Sorry Simms mate I wasn't critiquing you, they were just some very funny stories! I stand by the 'lad' comment though. That's impressive Sir.

 

I think you've won already simms lad.

 

Anonymous is a bit strong, this isn't a chatroom!

I was reading something out in assembly in Year 7 and said 'the girl was breastless' instead of 'breathless'. That is my contribution, I don't want to share the naked archery/flogging session with everyone.

 

:biggrin: Probably shouldn't have laughed at this but couldn't help myself!

As for my embarrassing moments, none really, just generic stuff. Most embarrassing thing i've ever seen for someone else has to be a young lad in year 9 being 'skanked' while swinging from rugby posts, and then was too scared to get back down. He hung there for a good few minutes, **** and b@lls out in front of about 120 school kids from our school, and a further 100 from the school that shared our school fields. Unbelievable Jeff!!

 

I read this thread and I cried........ laughing, Sorry Simster.


The only embarrassing thing that happened to me that I care to mention is the Xmas play, I was father Christmas and almost swallowed my beard.:dismay:

Why do they put kids through rubbish like that.

 

On the touching c0cks theme.. when a school kid myself - although this didn't atually happen at school so stretching it a bit (the theme not the ****!) - I would have my hair cut at a barbers in South Oxhey.
I used to dread this as one of the men would rub his chap (still in his trousers) on my arms if I had them on the armrests. Very unnerving for a boy of 9 or so!

He would also stroke my ears a bit too which to this day has left me with a reaction of wanting to rip out the innards of anybody who touches them in an affectionate way.

As for at school nothing too life changing - the usual of talking loudly over the general chatter at lunchtime in the school dining area when everybody would stop talking en masse.. except me! I'd manage to say very loudly the next two or three words before engaging my brain and shutting up much to everyone else's amusement.

But for barbers, c0cks, armrests and ear touching though.. I could have turned out so much more relaxed about getting a hair cut.

 

One that I will share because I look back and often laugh about it:

We had a theatre company come in to school and perform Shakespeare as we had an exam on Macbeth and they were pulling people from the audience. Most people who got pulled up had to do something meaningful, but i was pulled up just to say "horror, horror, horror" and then to walk off stage. Easy. So I thought I would be a bit 'cool' and say it in a disinterested way- to show that it was a bit of a waste to just get me to say 3 words. Although if like me and woy hodgson you struggle to say your r's they probably picked the worst 3 words ever! So as I said it in a nonchalant way everyone burst out laughing as i clearly said "howow howow howow"- lesson learnt, if you've got to do something public make sure you do it properly!

 

I am sure most people have done it, but when you accidentally call your teacher 'mum' at the age of 13 is not too high up my list of accomplishments.

I had the a similar thing to A.Web with a theatre company coming into school. We all had to sit cross-legged whilst the SNAP theatre people or whatever they were called done their business. About 5 mins into a 60 minute performance I realised that I needed to do fart. I tried my best to hold it in and spent the whole performance with a grimace on my face and managed to successfully do this task for 59mins and 59 secs, just as the actor bloke went 'I would just like to say a big.....' I came in with the loudest phrummmph you can imagine. It took a long, long time for me to forget that I can tell you, mates now, 20 years on still remind me.

I also happened to split my trousers right down the middle and showed my lovely red Woolworth's ladybird pants to the school and their families in a school play as I sang 'Drunken Sailor' with all the actions and got to the bit where you sang 'Ho! Ho! and up she rises'. Good job I was young as that would have scarred me for life!

As I used to be a classroom teacher, I have seen my fair share of embarrassing things and experienced a few. My best was a boy called Nelson pleasuring himself in the middle of the lesson, I realised what he was doing under the table and went absolutely loopy telling him to stop (wasn't going to grab him was I!) and all that, obviously all the other kids realised as well and started laughing at him, his reply... 'sorry sir, can't stop, I am in the zone!'. Now we all know what the 'zone' is, but best not to reach that in Geography class about fair trade, and in a boys school (I can only assume it was the pics of the rather large Ghanian farmer with her lack of a good bra that done it for him)! I head of pastoral and myself had a meeting with the boy and his parents the next day, I have never seen a more embarrassed and ashamed 15 year in my career since! It didn't help that some of my so-called colleagues managed to get his Geography book and stick the pages together with pritt-stick, can imagine the laugh from the kids next lesson. These colleagues also put pictures of Nelson's Column all over my room and in the staff room as well and wouldn't shut up about it for months, cheers fellas!

 

I am dying with laughter.

Last year I ran into a year eight girl while playing football, ripped a hole in my trousers and everyone spread round the story that a year eight girl floored me and beat me up.
I have many more stories but no, a disabled person has never tried to feel me up

 

Wow I have never heard of anything like that before! What else was did you do when he touched you? Did the school provide you with free councilling sessions after that!?

I was/kind of still am known as the cripple. Since year 7, I've broken in total of 13 bones all but one of those happened at school or playing for the school. Including my nose, my arm 3 times, my toe and 8 fingers. The most embarrassing was when I was playing with a bouncy ball, the girl who is now my girlfriend kicked my finger as I went to pick up the ball and broke it... Luckily I haven't broken a bone in over 2 years :biggrin:

 

I broke my wrist as a 10 year old playing football on a concrete playground, had it in a giant plaster cast right up to my armpit and was absolutely delighted, (as was my Mother), when it was taken off after 6 weeks. The very day after it was removed I broke it again playing football on the same playground. I got both barrels from the old girl and the bloke in the hospital who took it off told me he'd cut my arm off if I did it again. I believed him!

 

When I was eight or nine I done a swimming gala at middle school. I have never been much of a swimmer but my chances were diminished further when I had been suffering a bit of sun stroke in the build up to it. All the pupils were sat in a mini stand at one side of the pool and all the teachers were sat the length of the other side of the pool. I was doing the backstroke and there were five or six others in the water with me. The race started, I got about half way up the pool and I was sick, and obviously doing the backstroke that caused a bit of an issue. I ended up waving my arms about and generally looking very special with vomit all over my face and thrashing my arms about like a good ‘un. I managed to make it to the side of the pool where the PE teacher lifted me out by my arms. As I was held in the air by my arms, my shorts came down baring my backside to all of my fellow pupils and my twig and berries to all of the teachers. That was a terrible day.

 

Some absolutely cracking stories in here. Great thread. Worst moment for me probably came when I was in year 10 or 11. Ate something dodgy at lunch from the cafeteria, by the late afternoon my stomach was giving me all kinds of hell. Lack of toilet paper in any of the bogs forced me to hold it in. Final class of the day came around I was suffering big time and finally started to crack up. Let out a terrible fart that brought some minor relief, unfortunately the smell was so bad that the teacher sent me out of the class. By this point, I'd lost my dignity so just went to take a dump and figured I'd use some paper from my school books to clean up. Penguin walked it to the crapper and finally let it rip, whilst simultaneously vomiting. Not sure what made me puke, maybe it was just the strain of holding it in for so long. Obviously, paper from my books wasn't much use with the torrent of liquid that escaped my body so I used my underwear to clean up and chucked them in the bin - mate walked in just as I was disposing of the evidence, naturally told the rest of the class. Went commando for the rest of the day, then suffered the 40 minute bus ride home needing to **** again, got home and did it all again with the vomit and everything. Absolute horror show.

 

Hahahaha that is brilliant!

Same sort of thing happened to me once. Was in a staff meeting at work with all the big managers. The centre manager started talking about a pretty serious subject, as he begun my stomach started to **** and turn. I put all my efforts into holding it in, and I have no idea what my manager was saying as I couldnt even listen.
Suddenly, I got a tickle in my throat...as I coughed, I let out the fart I had been holding in for about 10mins and it wasn't the quietest..I was sitting on a wooden chair so it sort of projected the sound and me and the person sitting next to me were crying with laughter. We pulled it together and stopped laughing finally, but everytime we looked at each other we burst out laughing again.
Was so embarassing :|

In primary school once, it was lunchtime and I was sitting in the lunch hall eating. I felt so ill, and as a dinner lady walked past me, I stood up to tell her I felt sick. I think I managed to say "I feel s...." I chundered all over her feet. Was embarassing at the time but looking back now its pretty funny!

 

My most embarrassing moment is also one of my greatest sporting moments.

Playing Rugby in Year 8 our prop broke through their defensive line and dashed for the rush. Being a big lad he's quite slow, but also took about 5 players to stop him. He offloaded to me 10 yards from the try line. A desperate defender tried to grab me, but only managed to reach through my shorts, cycling shorts, and partly my boxers.

6 years later and still my only try or goal in competitive Football or Rugby is remembered because of my right ******* hanging out as I crossed the line.

Again in sport, playing centre back this time. The oppo striker had rounded the keeper, but I managed to track back and head the ball off the line from his shot. Trying to look nonchalent and cool, I tried to turn back out of the goalmouth with a bit of swag and confindence, but only turned straight into the post and knocked myself out. I had braces at the time as well, and they cut my lips and the inside of my mouth so there was blood all over my face.

 

:]]:]]:]]

 

Some cracking stories in here, keep them coming.

I remember one day, when I was much younger in primary school. I used to get a cab to school, along with 3 or 4 other children. I must've been running late or something because I seem to recall wolfing down my breakfast and running for the cab. A few minutes later, I suddenly felt rather unwell. I knew the inevitable was coming but before I had a chance to alert anyone, BOOM. Vomit everywhere. All down my person and my schoolbag. Somehow it came out silently (wtf?) so everyone else in the car were non the wiser, apart from the young lad sitting next to me (totally unscatched - I must've had had supreme aim) who spent the rest of the journey looking at me with a mixtue of utter disgust and sympathy. I was sent home from school without even getting out of the car.

 

I've accidentally called a teacher 'mum' but I know that I'm not the only one.

I once arrived a couple of minutes late into class and asked a friend what was going on. There was quite a bit of chatter in the room but he said that the teacher was droning on about the importance of work ethic. I said "same as normal then" just as the chatter stopped because he had started reading out the exam results, that I had come top of the year.

Everyone in the year gave me grief about it for about 2 years for being an arrogant **** even though I wasn't trying to be. Such is school life.

 

:sign15:, on a serious note that was the worst thing about braces, the way they would slice open your mouth

 

I went to a catholic school. The most embarassing thing was when I shat on Father O'Flaherty's member, just as he was about to reward me for a good performance in choir.

 

Anybody have any nicknames or anything they used to call other kids?

 

That Scottish bird's in for a shock then...

 

I thought it was compulsory?

 

Oi! Don't knock Catholic schools! I had great fun at mine, and it didn't involve any priests getting their sack out or anything like that if that's what you're thinking.