Random annoying things

has your mum told you about the cooties then?

 

Ok i'm sure it is a sign of getting old but low slung jeans do my head in. Why the feck do I want to look at some spotty chav's pants. I just don't get it.



And yes before anyone asks I would have no objection at all to a fit bird wearing low slung jeans.

 

The what?:doh:

 

People at football matches who slag off Player X when in fact it is Player Y who is on the ball. If you can't see properly, adjust your seat/glasses or just keep quiet.

 

Oversized baseball caps with big gold stickers on

 

How women get cheaper car insurance than blokes - even though they cause most the accidents.

 

Got to be the worst out of all the things I've seen on this thread. There was a woman I used to be in contact with quite alot at work (over the phone). Everytime I asked her for a 'favour' (by which I mean something that was part of her job, that she is getting paid for, often as small as authorising something with a signature), she would tell me in her most stressed out tone that she 'really didn't have time for this' etc. Try not spending 10 minutes *****ing on the phone about every small task your asked to do and learn how to manage your work load then you silly bint!!! :rant::forehead:

 

Samaritans - +448457909090

I'll just leave that there...

 

slow ****ing walkers
like honestly, walk faster or move out the ****ing way

people who slow down when you want to cross the road, making you wait longer. carry on driving at speed or stop ffs!

people who get on the train before letting you get off

uneducated people

parents who smoke around their children

 

Spots v stripes. Pathetic idea by an Apprentice wannabe probably.

 

The facebook group "Today is 10/10/10, won't happen again for another 1000 years so you might as well like it ♥"

Well. Actually it will happen in another 100 years you dumasses.

******ed facebook groups in general wind me up tbh.

 

Imagine the uproar if facebook had been around in 10/10/1010?

There would have been tidal waves as legions of 14 year old girls wet themselves with excitement.

 

I hate the over use of the word "like."

"I was like, talking to this guy and he was all like, "Where are you going" and I was all like, "None of your business" and then like, he started to like, you know, like look at me, like, you know, like he was like going to like kill me or like something."

Oh and the same people, who always end their sentences with a rising pitch, as if they are asking a question?

 

No doubt next year there will be a group for 11/11/11... I can't wait to joing that one!

 

How racist! The french and the welsh are lovely people!

 

No they aren't!

 

My pet hate is people who can't spell 'join'

 

Also people who think that cover versions of songs are better then the original, or that new movies are better then the original, namely charlie and the chocolate factory! The old one is my favourite movie of all time, and to hear it slanderd as rubbish compared to the new one annoys me a lot. Obviously there are few exceptions to new things being better then old ones, but like none come to mind at the moment like.

 

Lying in a Hospital bed with tubes coming out of every oriface, intravenus drips carefully placed into a clean area on your arms a big sign above you saying "Nil By Mouth". Then a vistor comes in says "Are you feeling any better, you look better, I got you some fresh fruit and juice whenever you feel like it"

Be honest do I look any better, read the sign above and now ****off and leave me in peace.

 

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i hate it when i'm standing at a pedestrian crossing and someone with more momentum than me makes it onto the road first. i time these things perfectly. i should always be first

 

I do love that song tbh. I assume you posted it as its a cover?

 

Whiskey in the Jar by Thin Lizzy? House of the Rising Sun by Frijid Pink? All Along the Watchtower by Jimi Hendrix? Hallelujah by Jeff Buckley?

There are loads of cover versions that are better than the original. I assume you mean the ones by Leona Lewis and Ticher Strider or those of a similar ilk.

 

Automated telephone services at Large Corporations.

Press 1 ; Name

Press 2 ; A/N

Press 3 ; Postcode

Etc Etc , you finally get through the Automatic checking to get through to a call centre in Upper Nepal.

Name ? "Just told you that."

A/C ? "Just told you that

Postcode ? "Just told that."

Final Question Sir, Date of Birth ? " 29/06/64.

"Thankyou for calling Scotlands favourite airline, Shetland International, how may we help you ?"

"I'm looking for a flight from London to Tokyo via , Chicago a stopover of 3 days in San Francisco, then onto Hawai for 1 day, then onto Tokyo."

Long silence, frantic clicking on the keyboard.

"I'm sorry to keep you waiting, we are unable to help you on this number but if you call 0845 1000000000 we will be able to assist you"

Long silence.

Is there anything else we can help you with today"

"egh, no just **** off"

"Thankyou for calling Shetland Airlines"

 

99% of cover versions are done because the target audience are unaware that the original exists, so the artist gets away with delivering something which appears new and fresh.

It's very rare indeed that someone actually reinvents a song and makes it worth doing a new version.

Jeff Buckley's Hallelujah is OK, but it's not as good as Alexandra Burke's

 

You're an Alexandra Burke.

 

People who send you an email...and then ring you up to say "Bloke, I just sent you an email" and proceed to talk about the content, and expect you to deal with it there and then. Either email me, or phone me...not flipping well both, you dumb-ass, I'll decide my priorities not you. (Grrr)

Also, sweeping generalisations:
"half the time"
"this always happens"
"they never have any of those in stock"
"99% of cover versions" (sorry Moog!)

 

Headlights that blind you. Do these not fail MOT's??

 

Nah, they're Xenons.

Only problem being, if they're not installed properly with levellers etc then they don't sit right, especially when the car bumps around.

I have them, but they're installed properly.

 

I did say there were a few exceptions. And I don't know who Leona or Ticher are?

 

Having a spiders web wrap itself around your head the moment you walk out of the house in the morning :doh:.

 

Stop putting aftershave on your head.

 

That wouldn't stop me walking into the web, but it might scare the spider.

Getting hungry at 10am!

 

double maths.

 

Getting to work really early.