What areas of Vicarage Road are best for babe action?

Discussion in 'Yellow Pages' started by Mogul, Sep 29, 2017.

  1. Mogul

    Mogul Academy Graduate

    What part of the ground is best for pulling bits of tail? Is there a recognised section where it's safe to assume the crumpet is all up for it and a gentlemen can make approaches and be a bit suggestive, if you know what I mean? ;)

    Also I was reading about gender neutral toilets becoming the norm because they discriminate against trans people. It would be great if Watford, as a progressive modern club, followed this example. Any guy who has ever used a bog right after a hot babe and felt the seat all nice and warm from her butt action will know where I'm coming from.
     
  2. Relegation Certs

    Relegation Certs Squad Player

    honestly I find the best place to pick up men is quite simply the gents toilets.

    A simple "nice meat mate" at the urinals is usually enough to ensure you'll be packed to the rafters with **** after the match.
     
    Jossy and kVA like this.
  3. Jellyman

    Jellyman Squad Player

    I would happily see this thread pinned, if only to embarrass you for eternity.
     
  4. oxhey67

    oxhey67 Squad Player

    Send the second paragraph of your post to the club, minus the opening word, and I can see no reason (other than sanity and good taste) why gender neutral toilets wouldn't be implemented before the season is out.
     
  5. Mogul

    Mogul Academy Graduate

    You're sick. You should be ashamed of yourself.
     
  6. GoingDown

    GoingDown "The Stability"

    We genuinely have the ugliest supporters in the Premier League, maybe ever.
     
  7. Mogul

    Mogul Academy Graduate

    I dunno if that's true. Not the best judge of blokes looks but there's lots of females I'd do.
     
  8. Mogul

    Mogul Academy Graduate

    Anyway, who looks at the mantelpiece when you're stoking the fire?
     
  9. hornmeister

    hornmeister Tired

    My pants.

    /end thread.
     
    kVA likes this.
  10. Stevohorn

    Stevohorn Watching Grass Grow

    I dunno.. maybe using terms like "pulling bits of tail" and "who looks at the mantelpiece when you're stoking the fire?" might exclude you from the "babe action"?

    You might well have to revert to using the (Sir Elton John) gender neutral toilets to see any action at all id have thought.
     
  11. Mogul

    Mogul Academy Graduate

    Get a sense of humour mate. We're all blokes here. Christ.
     
  12. Relegation Certs

    Relegation Certs Squad Player

    what's the matter mate? Don't like being objectified? I bet you'd make a terrific little twink.
     
    Happy bunny likes this.
  13. Diamond

    Diamond First Team

    Away is best, look for vegetable holders.
     
  14. Leighton Buzzer

    Leighton Buzzer Reservist

    I think you make a navigational error.
    You should be heading for a lap dancing club, rather than a football club.
    Although, then again, reading "Bits of Tail" maybe a gay bar like Pink Punters might be more suitable.
     
  15. Which area, not what area, you ignoramus.
     
  16. Stevohorn

    Stevohorn Watching Grass Grow

    I think you will find there are plenty of "bits of tail" on this forum.

    They might not find your sexist ramblings very funny either.
     
    cyaninternetdog likes this.
  17. Burnsy

    Burnsy First Team

    32B, Rookery. Where I may or may not sit.
     
  18. Harrow Orn

    Harrow Orn Squad Player

    They can hold my cucumber if they want.

    Sent from my SM-G950F using Tapatalk
     
  19. Leighton Buzzer

    Leighton Buzzer Reservist

    We are not all blokes here.
    In your sexist brain, the ladies on this forum don't even exist!!
     
    cyaninternetdog likes this.
  20. HoMogul

    HoMogul Academy Graduate

    Remember this my mortal foe. Wherever you go, I will be right behind you.
     
  21. hornmeister

    hornmeister Tired

    Bring tweezers
     
  22. Harrow Orn

    Harrow Orn Squad Player

    Its the cold weather ffs

    Sent from my SM-G950F using Tapatalk
     
    hornmeister likes this.
  23. kVA

    kVA Reservist

    I remember you now, hope you enjoyed it as much as I did...............kissy, heart smilie emoji thingy......
     
  24. kVA

    kVA Reservist

    I like you, you seem really butch
     
  25. Generic_Yute

    Generic_Yute Academy Graduate

    Unrelated Topic. Was at Club getting drunk about an hour ago, No toilet roll in Toilets. Run to Flat 20 minutes away, fully relieve myself, my sub liquid sub solid mess swimming around my gooch for 20 minutes. Mess everywhere, Needless to say.

    There is tail everywhere.
     
  26. Relegation Certs

    Relegation Certs Squad Player


    What normal human being wouldn't just sacrifice a sock in that situation?
     
  27. kVA

    kVA Reservist

    No babe action then?

    If you wish to have more control over your urges, you should try cutting out FODMAP foods from you diet......Google it.
     
  28. Cassetti's Beard

    Cassetti's Beard First Team

    I saw a grown man get caught short at Brentford away a few seasons back, he had to squat outside in the bushes near the co-op to unleash the turd that had been brewing. A sock was sacrificed for the cause.
     
    RookeryDad likes this.
  29. Bunny Larkin

    Bunny Larkin Academy Graduate

    Those who can, do - those who can' t talk about it.
     
  30. Stevohorn

    Stevohorn Watching Grass Grow

    From butt action to shitting outside the Co-op..

    One wonders where this thread is going next :oops: Or rather i'm trying not to.
     
  31. Necrobutcher

    Necrobutcher Reservist

    There must be loads of nice ladies in the cemetery across the road. It's unfortunate that it's not the best location to do some digging.
     
    lm_wfc likes this.
  32. Generic_Yute

    Generic_Yute Academy Graduate

    I was too drunk to think of a Sock, I have now learnt my lesson.
     
  33. KelsoOrn

    KelsoOrn Squad Player

    Yes, I remember the vivid and exquisitely detailed description of the Reids' 'caught short' incident and its 'sock solution' with some fondness.

    It really should have featured prominently again on last week's matchthread.
     
  34. Pob

    Pob Reservist

    I just don't think vicarage Road is the place to meet ladies. The odds and the selection aren't good. Maybe it's more of a place to forge a meaningful relationship with someone you have something in common with ie. The horns
     
  35. Pob

    Pob Reservist

    As for sexism in football and elsewhere i deplore it. But I am a hypocrite as I recall as a youth chanting "get your **** outs for the lads" when I was in the old north stand home end whenever vaguely attractive lady walked past on the pitch. Not proud and have hopefully matured a little.
     

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