[CONFIRMED] WE NEED A GOAL SCORER

The lyrics to World in Motion?

 

I couldn't resist trying to rap this... badly

 

STM, looks like you took 28 mins to do so, so fair play.

Wasn’t JB a one take wonder for his version?

 

What clubs do the Japanese strikers play for? Could they be worth considering after their performances tonight?

 

Penaranda and Success our new first choice combo up front........

 

Is it wrong that they fill me with more hope than any of last season’s attempts at forging a strike force?

One a failed womaniser with a taste for cream liquor and the other is just a myth that I’ve never even seen play club football for over 2 years.

 

Yeah, I couldn't do it in one take.

JB's second finest moment in an England shirt if so...

Wasn’t it the case that hardly any players turned up to be in the song and video? Missed out on an all time classic

 

That’s right.

About 5 or 6, including Gazza.

 

Have we even been linked with a forward during the window?

 

Wiki takes up the story:

A rap is performed by England player John Barnes towards the end of the track. Barnes was selected to perform the rap, after a contest with other players including Peter Beardsley, Paul Gascoigne, and Chris Waddle.[7] The rap was improvised on the spot with Liverpool's Craig Johnston, who was not involved in the England set up in any way, penning the rap on a scrap of paper. The sleeve credits Barnes, Beardsley, Gascoigne, Waddle, Steve McMahon and Des Walker as providing vocals, though the entire squad is seen miming to the refrain in the video.

Back to me:

Interesting man, Johnston. Invented the Predator boot & a system for tracking which items have been taken from a minibar.

 

I believe he is Godfather.

 

So which of our other contributors is Gascoigne?

 

I heard Keith Allen speaking about this.
Gazza was brilliant apparently in terms of rhythm and timing,as you would imagine.
Trouble was nobody could understand a word he said,so they went with Digger.
I can confirm this as Gazza used to live at Dobb's Weir near Broxbourne LTC and used to play at the club with some of our juniors.
My boss used to frequent the Paddyfields restaurant in Hertford with Gazza.Bill would be drunk as a skunk and Gazza was,well,just Gazza.
It was incoherent babble to the rest of the population but they seemed to understand each other!

 

Would that be the utter **** system they employ at the MGM Grand in Vegas ? Fridge filled with massively over-priced booze as usual. Lots of local shops with cheap booze and soft drinks. Aha, a plan - shift stuff around and fill fridge with cheap purchased stuff which we'd drink, leaving original stuff there when we left ! .....Nope. We were told if you so much as move anything in the fridge, a system will detect it and you will be charged for it as it will be assumed you've consumed it. So drink lovely cold overpriced stuff or room temperature cheap stuff from the local shops. B*****ds. I hate him.

 

Whilst one is a small sample, this case study suggests Mr Johnston's patent is outstandingly effective in eliminating theft.

Kudos to what is obviously a restless creative mind (two, if you include TUT's).

Can you imagine, on his footballing retirement, Danny Murphy inventing a device to keep bike seats dry in the rain or a portable mobile phone charger?

More Johnstons, fewer Murphys.

(Indeed, less Murphy.)

 

That system is certainly not peculiar to Las Vegas.

Pouring cold water into a sink or bath and then plunging bottle or can into it for a while can minimise the unpleasant warmth.

 

Pound to a penny, Johnston is devising a plug in can cooler as we write.

His twin devices begin an arms race against each other.

Machiavellian, really.

 

I assumed it wasn't peculiar to LV. Its just where I first encountered it and where it really p****d me off given the heat.
We found the best way to cool the cheap bulk drink purchased was to request a spare room key and then leave the aircon full on at minimum temperature when we went out. Semi-cool drink AND f***ed up their overheads.

 

Most us hotels have an ice machine

 

All US hotels.

 

Mina anyone?

 

Mina strikes me as Angella Plus.

I can point to the exact spot at Dog Crap Park of the incident.

My heart is melting already.

 

He looks a very good player, and I would not mind if he came to WFC, but he aint the goal scorer we need, he's a defender isn't he?

 

In this case yeah, we were linked with Santi Mina from Valencia earlier in the summer. 22 yo Spanish striker.

 

Fran Sol seemed pretty close to signing at one stage.

 

Debrel(?) earlier in the summer too - very unimpressive scoring record though. Difficult finding a cheap striker who has any sort of track record to suggest he will score in the prem.

 

WTF is going on!

Are we ever going in for a STRIKER

 

WHO KNOWS? I DON'T.

 

KNOCK KNOCK

 

Who's there?

 

Who said we haven’t?

 

You seem a tad obsessed with this.

We have lots of strikers or players that could play up front, Richarlison for example.

Moreover, strikers are high maintenance, dinosaur apex predators that take eat more than their share of the buffet in all ways.

I’m sure we are looking at STRIKERS, but until the right one is available it makes no sense to sign one who will almost certainly be an utter twunt.

Can we now please retire this headache inducing thread title?

 

Deeney.

 

Why 180 degree change in strategy?

 

Gray's silliness complicates things. Not sure what his relevant legal dates are, but it makes him less saleable. I think GP was planning on using cash from the sale of Doucoure and at least one striker- perhaps two, to recycle into another forward. Plan likely still the same. See if any of Success, Penaranda, Oulare look like helping... see which clubs come in for whom... sell some, buy one new one, use the rest of the cash for more younglings. Sent from the mobile client - Forum Talker