Things you hate III

Discussion in 'Taylor's Tittle-Tattle - General Banter' started by Otter, Dec 11, 2015.

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  1. Hornpete

    Hornpete Squad Player

    If you didnt plastic coat fruits then it would go off as quick as milk in the sun. You dont have to throw your straws in the sea either.
     
  2. PhilippineOrn

    PhilippineOrn First Team

    It helps the fish scuba diving. Regular snorkels are just too big for their little mouths.
     
  3. I Blame Pozzo

    I Blame Pozzo First Team

    I came in from the club at about 5pm today.
    I was sure I brought in a small plastic bag,the sort you put loose vegetables in,on my stairs.
    It had my lip balm and my magnifying glass in.
    I cannot for the life of me find it!
    I've looked in the bin,the recycling bag, the car.I've even looked in the fridge,freezer and oven.
    Nowhere.
    Anyone seen it?
     
  4. Keighley

    Keighley First Team

    You’ll find it in the last place you look!

    Why the magnifying glass, incidentally? Trying to start fires?
     
  5. I Blame Pozzo

    I Blame Pozzo First Team

    I hope so!
    Even though I am slightly guilty of subscribing to 'The Iris Murdoch School of Interior Design' I can't fathom where it's gone!
    As it was so bright today I wore lenses and sunglasses instead of my spectacles. I took my Greek books with me and with my lenses I sometimes have trouble identifying the accents etc.
    It was a lovely one too,from The Bodleian.
    It has,in the words of Lord Percy Percy, "vanished,like an old oak table".
     
  6. The undeniable truth

    The undeniable truth First Team Captain

    sprouts.
    wasps
    dentists
    heights
     
  7. PhilippineOrn

    PhilippineOrn First Team

    Mimes.
    First of all they freak me out. More than clowns. Secondly, how are they even a form of art or entertainment? They all do the same damm thing, either walking against imaginary wind, tugging on an imaginary rope or navigating their way around an imaginary wall, and that's it. Even a ventriloquist has a bigger repertoire and are more entertaining and they are rubbish too.
    Thirdly, not only do they all do the same they all look the bloody same. Blue and white horizontal shirt and whited out faces. Why can't they be outed as insulting to Caucasians and go the same way as the Black & White Minstrels?
     
  8. Bwood_Horn

    Bwood_Horn Squad Player

    Are there still a couple of Norway-base 'Orns (Ørns?) on here. I heard something on the radio t'other week about all (?) plastic bottles having been designed/maufactured to ease re-cycling - the cap and bottle made from the same material, no "excessive" labelling (no labelling at all) and quite a substantial refundable deposit - any chance of some pics of these?
     
  9. Bwood_Horn

    Bwood_Horn Squad Player

     
  10. Otter

    Otter Gambling industry insider

    I had a heated argument with a mime artist once in York city centre.
     
  11. Keighley

    Keighley First Team

    A silent one?
     
  12. Otter

    Otter Gambling industry insider

    No, when I was at university I volunteered for RAG and I was one of two RAG Reps for my hall at Loughborough so virtually every Saturday in term time we would go out and rattle a tin for whatever charity had got a permit to do so in whatever town or city. On one particular day we were in York, I found a spot in the city centre and went about my business collecting. After about 2 hours I notice near me a bloke turn up in yellow including skin painted yellow set up his pitch and did his thing, he was probably about 10-15 metres away from me; then after half an hour or so he came up to me and demanded that I leave the area because I was affecting his business. I told him that I was there first, I was collecting for cancer research (or whatever it was), I had a permit giving me the legal right to be where I was and suggested he move elsewhere. He told me that he was there every week, good for him, hopefully he would make more money next week; however in the meantime I pointed out to him that he was looking very silly arguing with a charity collector and wasn't going to be doing himself any favours. I can't remember how it ended but I'm sure I stayed where I was for a couple more hours.
     
    Keighley likes this.
  13. wfcmoog

    wfcmoog Tinpot

    You should've tried this:

     
  14. Bwood_Horn

    Bwood_Horn Squad Player

    Just sorting out the tickets for the 'Wood's day in the sun. Through http://www.wembleystadium.com/ and I have to check a box to agree that I want to pay an extra "...£1 for a print at home ticket..."
     
    oxhey67 likes this.
  15. I Blame Pozzo

    I Blame Pozzo First Team

    Found them at the club,I didn't take them home after all!
    Stupid bint!
     
    Keighley likes this.
  16. Hornpete

    Hornpete Squad Player

    They have already printed the ticket, costs 50p to post it or £1.50 to shred and dispose of via data protection laws (GDPR). Printing at home is a privilege, typical entitled Watford fans.
     
  17. wfcmoog

    wfcmoog Tinpot

    Telephone answering services for small businesses and the way that they pretend that they aren't an outsourced service.

    Me: Hi, can I please speak to John
    Operator (with background noise of 100 other operators taking calls for 10000 other companies): Certainly sir, can I ask who's calling?
    Me: WFC
    Operator: and what's your surname please WFC?
    Me: Moog
    Operator: and from where are you calling Mr. Moog?
    Me. WFC Forums
    Operator: thank you Mr. Moog, and can I please tell Mr. John what the call is regarding
    Me: it's just following up on the call we had yesterday
    Operator: that's perfect, OK I'll just transfer you now
    ***Short delay on hold***
    Operator: I'm terribly sorry Mr. Moog but John has just stepped away from his desk, can I take a message?
    Me: No it's fine
    Operator: are you sure, I can tell John to phone you back
    Me: I can email John just as easily as you can, thanks

    It's the insult to one's intelligence as they go through the charade of pretending they are an intrinsic part of the company, rather than a remote telephone message service. If John's not there, that's fine, I'll send him an email, but I don't need to be interrogated about it first.
     
  18. Clive_ofthe_Kremlin

    Clive_ofthe_Kremlin Squad Player

    Yes, but as one who is forced into doing this nonsense, I can tell you that if you put the call through to Mr John, he'll demand to know exactly who it is calling, what company he's from and what he wants before he agrees to take the call.

    Failure to elicit full and comprehensive details from the caller (who inevitably has an indecipherable name and works for a company that you can't make out even after they've repeated it three times) will cause Mr John to explode in hyper-ventilating rage. "Who? Who? Never heard of any Mr Mogg! Ask him what he wants! Ask him why he's calling me and not someone else! Who are WFC Foams anyway? Never heard of 'em!"


    Even then, in many cases, they demand that you to lie to the caller. "Tell them I'm in a meeting...." is the favourite. I am very uncomfortable with lying on behalf of corporate big shots. I just say "He's unavailable at the moment" but I swear that one of these days I'm going to say "He says to say he's in a meeting...".
     
    wfcmoog likes this.
  19. wfcmoog

    wfcmoog Tinpot

    I would've suggested doing away with then altogether except for doing you out of your minimum wage, zero hours job.
     
  20. Meh!

    Meh! Pre-Dictator

    Sky News notifications.

    No Sky, nothing about the royal wedding is breaking news.
     
    HappyHornet24 likes this.
  21. Diamond

    Diamond First Team

    Looking at all the freaks in Windsor. I saw 2 middle aged ladies who'd brought a giant costco cake with them with the words "Harry and Megan" iced on it. Where do these people come from?
     
  22. PhilippineOrn

    PhilippineOrn First Team

    It does go to show though that republicanism is not the way forward for Britain. It might all be a soap opera but it's the world's greatest soap opera and benefits us all in unimaginable ways.
     
  23. Guy

    Guy Squad Player

    Stupid Brits abroad..... Lady going through security keeps asking am I in the right queue even though it's obvious and when gone through security screen which she sets off asks whete her tray is when it is obvious it's much further up the line because people passed her as she was patted down..... Fat as well..... Also had two good sized bags with her which against normal airline regulations.... Wonder how get on at home and shouldnt be allowed out of the country
    Also why do people stand and queue ages before flight at departure gate? Particularly when obvious bus will take them to the plane, what's point ? Earlier get in plane, earlier have to sit in crampt seat whilst others board. Don't get the mad stampede getting off the plane either.
     
  24. Mollyboo

    Mollyboo First Year Pro

    Well, you're certainly right about the unimaginable ways it benefits me.

    I can't imagine any at all.
     
  25. Bwood_Horn

    Bwood_Horn Squad Player

    Many years ago, when I lived in Vilnius, I remembered walking into my Ozzie (ex-Digger/squaddie) mate's flat for the first time. I thought he was one of the sane(r) ones - until I saw his wall sdecorated with numerous posters of the royal family. TBF he had carted these. literally, around the world with him (UK, Kazakhstan, Estonia, Lithuania and I imagine, finally, China). He kept going on and on and on and on and on about why I didn't have the same. To shut him up, I bought a large "proper" picture frame (about 1m by 0.75m) from a local junk shop and stuck a stamp (2nd class, of course) in the middle of it. My art-historian wife loved it and moved it from the toilet to pride of place in our lounge.
     
    Hornet4ever, Jossy and Diamond like this.
  26. And earlier get access to overhead lockers in case a fat lady with two good sized bags takes up all the locker space?
     
  27. Obviously not from school - you'd think that, if they were that infatuated, they could spell her name correctly.
     
    Diamond likes this.
  28. Diamond

    Diamond First Team

    Haha, shows how much notice I've been taking, had no idea her name had an h in it. F*** it, I'm off to Windsor.
     
    The undeniable truth likes this.
  29. PhilippineOrn

    PhilippineOrn First Team

    Honestly, I think I see more Union Jacks (flags) here than I've seen anywhere, including London. Trikes and jeepneys are emblazoned with it and there is no logical reason for it that I can see. T-shirts too but I've seen that in lots of countries including Russia.
     
  30. fan

    fan slow toaster

    why would a second class stamp from lithuania shut him up...
     
  31. Bwood_Horn

    Bwood_Horn Squad Player

    Fool. Anybody with more than one braincell would infer that it was a UK stamp as they would know that the Lithuanian post office doesn't operate a 2nd class service - it's all 3rd/4th class. Did I ever tell you about the time I had to pay a 40Lt fine for improperly addressed mail - apparently ENGLAND/ANGLIJA doesn't appear in their list of "recognised" delivery countries?
     
    RookeryDad likes this.
  32. Otter

    Otter Gambling industry insider

    I blame Brexit.
     
  33. UEA_Hornet

    UEA_Hornet First Team Captain

    GDPR. Or rather the annoying response of every company I've ever had dealings with to it. I've had 3 emails in the last half hour. It's a ******* nuisance.
     
    TheDon likes this.
  34. RookeryDad

    RookeryDad Squad Player

    When John (as in John Smith) metamorphosed into Mr John (as in Elton) my interest increased.

    Although it did dwindle a little soon after.
     
  35. RookeryDad

    RookeryDad Squad Player

    Moog.

    Mogg.

    Food for thought.
     
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