Adverts you hate

Discussion in 'Taylor's Tittle-Tattle - General Banter' started by Meh!, Mar 29, 2018.

  1. hornetgags

    hornetgags McMuff's lovechild

    The stupid fecking meerkats ones...I've booked a holiday to Africa so I can slaughter the b'stards.
  2. Squibba

    Squibba Predictor Choker 14/15

    The horrible James Corden and his stupid "vegas baby" ad
  3. zztop

    zztop Eurovision Winner 2015

    That stupid Flash advert where that bloke runs round the kitchen with a spray bottle singing along with an absolutely awful version of Queen's Flash.
  4. Bwood_Horn

    Bwood_Horn Squad Player

    Why is the completely hateful/undesirable Louise Mensch's face appearing alongside a banner ad for the "(5) Sebastian Prodl*" thread.

    *Call me picky, but shouldn't it be "Proedl" if your not using an umlaut?
  5. Smudger

    Smudger Messi's Mad Coach Staff Member

    Advertising is the rattling of a stick in the swill bucket of society. So said Eric Blair aka George Orwell. His disgust of the whole advertising industry was personified in the character of Gordon Comstock in Keep The Aspidistra Flying. And I couldn't agree more.

    I mute and change channels when they come on but unfortunately given we are saturated with them inevitably come across some. They all make me wonder who the awful people who come up with this rubbish are and do they have any scruples ? They constantly seek to exploit the worst facets of human nature, greed, avarice and a host of insecurities trying to pass off the banal as with gambling adverts as some sort of high stimulation intellectual exercise. There seems be nothing these winkers will do now to hook into your consciousness.

    Be it stupid phrases, dilly dilly ? Stupid visuals and gimmicks like twerking men in shorts or trying to pass themselves off as caring, concerned about you the individual while reeling off inane verbiage in the form of supposedly amusing poetry for instance. Not to mention getting away with plain lies. Cosmetics products for instance that claim to repair DNA, toothpaste that replaces lost enamel, or magic bacteria that restore the digestive tract to tip top condition. Only 87 people replied and strangely 91% agreed which means one person was for and against.

    And all this coupled with gleaming pseudo technological terms. One can see this in the escalation of the toothpaste marketing battles. A new technology coming along every week and for other products another pointless flavour. One of the worst culprits has to be McDonalds. Not only content with destroying the environment and ruining countless diets they prey on children as do countless other companies without any shame by providing happy meals as rewards for 'good ' children. And of course eating such a meal will help cope with the loss of a parent as in one of their infamous campaigns. But then again for such companies and their dreadful agencies any publicity is good publicity.

    One only has to look at the spiel put out by these agencies that they seem to regard themselves as wonderful creative types who are providing an invaluable service to the world. I would contend that they are responsible for this mad consumerism, for promoting values which are as I mentioned some of the worst in human society such as the label and sheeple society and even at times managing to mangle the language. Step up McDonalds again. I'm loving it. Hmm. I certainly not.

    Unfortunately advertising must work because the vast majority of the population are influenced by it and the characters they use to promote their tat and seem to watch it avidly like zombies. That parasite Markle wears one coat and sales of that precise coat rocket. Rather a sad reflection on the individuals mental capabilities. Be yourself not some corporate identikit. And of course those same characters that on one hand profess to loath rabid capitalism, heres looking at you Martin Freeman while propping up another moronic campaign for those inveterate corporate tax dodgers Vodafone.
  6. WillisWasTheWorst

    WillisWasTheWorst First Year Pro

    Quite a rant!
  7. Clive_ofthe_Kremlin

    Clive_ofthe_Kremlin Squad Player

    Yes Smudger. I grin when I hear people who say they're not influenced by advertising (which seems to be a claim made by most people!).

    The idea is not so much that you'll feel inspired to go out and buy whatever useless tat they're peddling, but rather to place the brand name in your consciousness. To make it a name you have "heard of".

    Then when you go to the shop and are faced with Heinz Baked Beans for 50p or Joe's Baked Beans for 40p, you'll take the Heinz because you've "heard of them" - even though Joe's might be better quality and tastier.

    It's simply about drumming that brand name and logo into you, over and over and over.

    Having lived in a country which was entirely free of advertising, save the odd revolutionary billboard by the side of the road, to return to it here in England was shocking and grating. I try to make a point of not buying anything that's advertised, on the grounds that they might think I've bought it because of the advert and then make more of them.
  8. RookeryDad

    RookeryDad Reservist

    The public like their swill, it would seem.
  9. RookeryDad

    RookeryDad Reservist

    Agree with all the above.

    Back to the golden age of TV ads.

  10. R4E

    R4E Reservist

    Funny... That Flake ad wasn't the original idea. THIS was the ad they first had commissioned but the execs at Cadbury's had a change of heart.
  11. Bwood_Horn

    Bwood_Horn Squad Player

    Like the original "Gold Blend" ad (possibly NSFW):

    Full sketch:
  12. Smudger

    Smudger Messi's Mad Coach Staff Member

    What is also disturbing is that certain firms like Springer-Verlag are trying to force people to watch advertisements whether they be on the television or internet. Thankfully a German court threw out their case that Ad Block Plus should not be allowed to be used by internet users. It should be a basic human right not to be subjected to advertisements. Ad Block Plus is certainly for me heaven sent and makes browsing the net a much better experience than before when one was subject to all manner of unwanted pop ups and adverts for things that no one needs.
    cyaninternetdog and Derbyhorn like this.
  13. WillisWasTheWorst

    WillisWasTheWorst First Year Pro

    We’re now entering the ‘gratuitous use of football’ period of TV advertising in the run-up to and during the World Cup. Trying to get us to buy a big new TV to watch it on is acceptable but linking all manner of unrelated products to football is beyond the pale.
  14. Bwood_Horn

    Bwood_Horn Squad Player

    The rates that these fcukers charge for subscriptions/access to their scientific journals would make a pay-day loan company blush with embarrassment.
  15. wfcmoog

    wfcmoog Tinpot

    Why am I motivated to purchase dye for pubic hair?
  16. Bring Back Standing

    Bring Back Standing First Year Pro

    Someone of the opposite sex has asked you to apply it for them?
  17. CaveManHornet

    CaveManHornet First Year Pro

    On the topic of adverts, there a few that have been really enjoyable to watch. GoPro do them really well; which is to be expected from a Premium brand of camera.

    I saw this advert years ago whilst on holiday and it has stuck in my mind since then, which shows that it's done its job.

    Perhaps it's not so successful in the sense that I haven't got a GoPro, nor do I intend to get one - however good their advertisements are :D
  18. zztop

    zztop Eurovision Winner 2015

    You are right, that is good.

    On a slightly less worthy note, I like the "Should've gone to Specsavers" adverts.

    For example, "I've got a cat here with no pulse, can we have a line in please?"

    ...and the understated reactions.
    Last edited: May 22, 2018
  19. Meh!

    Meh! Pre-Dictator

    Nationwide's latest attempt. As if the 2 sisters singing some crappy rhymes weren't bad enough, now some random idiot spouting some crappy "soulful" poem.

    I mean, most of the words he's rhyming with are the same words. People rhyming with people. At least get fricking creative if you're gonna spout some arsewipe lines.
    Cthulhu likes this.
  20. I Blame Bassett

    I Blame Bassett Squad Player

    I haven't seen that one.
    Should have stuck with Michael Barrett and Sue Lawley!
    Keighley and RookeryDad like this.
  21. Diamond

    Diamond Squad Player

    There is a theme with all building society adverts that after watching them I want to maim people.
    Unhappy bunny and Cthulhu like this.
  22. Cthulhu

    Cthulhu Keyboard Warrior Staff Member

    Thick tongued Mockney do gooder Thjamie Olivther and his fridge that makes food from rubbish
  23. Bwood_Horn

    Bwood_Horn Squad Player

    Unhappy bunny likes this.
  24. Cthulhu

    Cthulhu Keyboard Warrior Staff Member

    I cant decide what is worse the **** poem ones or the holier than though banks have a social conscience and want to discuss mental health hypocritical ones
    Unhappy bunny likes this.
  25. Diamond

    Diamond Squad Player

    That video is amazing, thanks for posting it.
    CaveManHornet likes this.
  26. I Blame Bassett

    I Blame Bassett Squad Player

    That is superb,thank you!
    CaveManHornet likes this.
  27. cyaninternetdog

    cyaninternetdog Forum Hippie

    "Where's your online sports betting company app ?"

    "What fvcking online sports betting company app?"

    Unhappy bunny likes this.
  28. The undeniable truth

    The undeniable truth Squad Player

    Yes. Absolutely in love with himself. Even before that advert he had one of those faces that you just wanted to punch.
    Last edited: Jul 10, 2018
  29. The undeniable truth

    The undeniable truth Squad Player

    Yes. "Take control" "cash in your investment" Lots of guys jumping up and down celebrating a goal and looking excitedly at their mobile phones. Ray Winston showing that cool hard men all have betting accounts. Pathetic. Where is the video of the guy selling his car and tv to pay off his debts or his wife packing their kids into the car as she leaves him.
    Unhappy bunny likes this.
  30. Grrwood

    Grrwood Reservist

    Judging by that nose I think someone beat you to it
  31. wfcmoog

    wfcmoog Tinpot

    I went on holiday to Djerba in Tunisia. After booking a tour around the island, I was getting very bored with the mundane and overhyped attractions on offer (very old synagogue, some mirage in the dessert, some tree) when the tour guide let slip that we were visiting an old town which was renowned for its meerkats. I was excited, the trip was looking up!

    Only when we arrived did I discover that the bloke just had a terrible accent and that his "meerkats" were open air, retail centres, of the agora variety, not super cute little weasel things.
    hornetgags and Cthulhu like this.
  32. PhilippineOrn

    PhilippineOrn Squad Player

    At least you got that rug to put on your living room wall.
  33. The undeniable truth

    The undeniable truth Squad Player

    Genuine meerkat too.
  34. Bwood_Horn

    Bwood_Horn Squad Player

    RookeryDad likes this.
  35. Maninblack

    Maninblack First Year Pro

    Announcements at every stop telling someone with a pushchair how to get off. Particularly at gone 11pm at night.

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