Bargain Hunt

Unlucky Auctioneer more like. Losses incoming.

Reds up first so mo surprises.

Dutch Auction start.

The Glass smashes with a 35 loss. Standard Wakeman start.

Dizzie dressed in one of those hypnotise patterns.





Another loss. And another. Anti-GG obtained.

A profit on the BB.

Reds -44

On;y Blue Daughter has turned up. The BH lurg strikes.

Profit on the Art Deco for the Blues

The Silver jug makes a profit.

GG on.

The skip rescued clock eventually makes a 1 note Yorks profit.

Well done Colin for doing it in small stages.

Plaidy's BB is a modesty screen for a modest profit?

125. Plaidy says it's a gamble. REJECTED. Sensible really.

It's struggling. 60 loss.

Still a GG for the Blues at a Colin Auction. Not to be sniffed at along with a 28 profit.

 

this is pretty great.
some very appealing items, and a couple of orgasm faces from Roo .
Brilliant 'start at a quid' stunt from Colin.

Poor old Plaidy! no gold despite sterling work.

Izzy rocking the 1940s prostitute look.
Timmy counts his coupons.

 

Not quite the right angle for a double sneaky peak. Boo.

 

Roo looking lovely today.

 

This was talked about twice before, in June 2022 and April 2023.

Reg:
It's the lovely Roo. Wearing her Full of Eastern promise outfit. Coffee grinder mentioned.

Oh dear. Mother trying to act "young".

Dizzie dressed like a Dr Zhivago extra.

Some weak haggling from the Red-headed Blues.

Don't buy that clock.

345 quid down to 125 for a Georgian champagne flute. Gulp.

Blues refrain from looking up the dolls dresses.

Roo cranks, grinds, and plunges.

Roo mentions mincers. We haven't had one of those on for a while.

Chester silver (ting).

Cream Jug for @wfcmoog

Red young bird looks like an Indian mystic with that headwear.

Plaidy hates the batteryless Sunburst clock.

Reds look like Ricky Gervais and Nicola Krankie.

Colin Young in full Rick-Wakeman mode.

The clock was former skipware LOL.

Rapido Young indeed.

Miserable auction for the Reds.

Not a total Dizzie disaster with that nice BB.

Absent mother. Her youth serum has obviously melted her face.

Plaidy working his magic. GG sneaked by some decent gavelling by Rick.

Victorian modesty screen. Plaidy never really plays safe. Tight estimate.

The gamble doesn't come off. Good job she rejected.

OT78:
titter:

Gives Roo an opportunity to demonstrate her grinding on camera.

but sadly, no coffee bean rubbing.

p.s. Dizzy filled those jeans very nicely & snugly.

Moog:
Quirky is the word of the day today.

Roo Irivine taking the reigns of her first episode as host, is out quirkied by Harlequin jacket wearing Nick and art student chic Izzie.

The blues are so quirky it hurts and they quirk themselves into a GG with some sound advice from Nick.

Blues overspend on a load of shyte and make 3 losses.

Rick Wakeman does his trick of trying to get the bidders to open at 70, then 50 then 20, before starting at a quid.

Golden gavels, a new host, a prog rocker on the rostrum? Yes- YES!

 

Ha.
Earlier, Reg mentioned:
"...the other one is called Heap, Uriah Heap."

What label were Uriah Heep on?
Another Reg post answers:



Vertigo being the early 70s home of many proto-Prog faves such as Colisseum...and it was Prog-Era Colin on duty today, of course!
Such synchronicity. (The Police's proggiest album, incidentally.)

 

Re-up from last April 2023.
BBC approved preamble:
Southwell 1
Series 62
https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m0018byw
Roo Irvine is at Southwell Racecourse, where experts Izzie Balmer and Nick Hall join the teams as they search for the best items to sell at auction. Roo enlists the help of the public to identify today’s mystery object.

The Translation:
What a pleasant surprise as the Delightful Roo Irvine, wearing a silk dress full of eastern promise, moves upstairs from being an expert to being today's presenter. Let's hope she still continues being an expert on other episodes too. Once again, we're back in Southwell/Southall racecourse in Notts with helpmates Dizzy Lizzie Izzie and Plaid to Bursting Nick Hall, the Keir Starmer stand-in. Hmmm, the Auction is with Rick Wakeman lookalike for hire, Colin Young, in the Lincs franchise of Steptoe's Thrift Store, Goddamn You Miser.

The Staff:
[Gaffer] Delightful Roo Irvine
[Red Team Expert] Izzie Lizzie Barmy Balmer
[Blue Team Expert] Nick Plaid All Over Hall
[Auctioneer] Colin Rapido Young, Rick Wakeman variant
[Auction Location] Golding Young & Mawer, Lincs
[Miserlin Rating] Approved

​

The Teams:
[Red Team] Married couple, photographer and radio producer
(Challenge: Storage)
[Blue Team] Mother and daughter, Mother Shawwon, both wearing s0dd1ng "look at me" red hats. Daughter reminds me of chinless Goth bird out of This Is England.
(Challenge: Entertainment)

The Sartorial elegance of the Blue Team with expert Nick The Plaidster Hall.

​

The Shopping:
Reds: Georgian glass champagne flute (125) maybe not, 1930s enamelled RAF badge (55) maybe, travelling cologne bottles in case (45 Challenge) maybe.
Blues: Art Deco-style Dancer sculpture table lamp (23 Challenge) a bargain, Georgian silver cream jug (125) a chance, naff Sunburst battery clock without battery (25) Plaidy hates, might be OK.

The Distraction:
Mystery object. A marmalade slicer. Next episode, a barrel scraper. Gives Roo an opportunity to demonstrate her grinding on camera.

​

The Auction:
Reds: Georgian glass champagne flute (loss), 1930s enamelled RAF badge (small loss), travelling cologne bottles in case (loss). Oh dear.
Dizzy's BB is an Art Nouveau glass epergne (44), 30-50, 60, hooray a profit. Well done Dizzy Barmy.

​

Blues: Art Deco-style Dancer sculpture table lamp (profit), Georgian silver cream jug (profit), naff Sunburst battery clock without battery (one note profit), Golden Gavel by a squeak.
Plaidy's BB Victorian modestry screen (125), she rejects, big Plaidy gamble, 30-50, 65, Plaidy dud. No harm done.

​

The Aftermath:
Starts off as the usual Young Auction. Very Dutch. Very Rapid. Very lossy. It then improves enough for the Blues to get the required profits. Roo looking great, the Presenting does suit her. Antiques Fair offering plenty of variety. Blue Mother succumbing to the BH lurg. Dizzie starts off dressed like a Dr Zhivago extra and ends up looking like she's been to a an all-night Syd Barrett era Pink Floyd gig. A real episode of opposing fortunes. Annoying Blues with Red hats get a golden gavel but with an expert loss, unusual for Plaidy, who guides his team to GG glory. Colin really helped to sell the former skipware clock by starting from zero and going up in increments of 1 then 2 pounds until it just sneaked over the profit line. So, we doff our hats to him for doing this. Reds have the opposite Triple Crown of losses, giving them an anti-GG, with an expert profit. A Golden Gavel at the Lincoln Franchise of PennyPinchers is most definitely not to be sniffed at.

​

The Hi-Kick:
Indoor Covid diagonal kick. A real mixed bag. Roo manages 90 in heels, Plaidy does alright, Dizzy Lizzie just about doing par but modestly blocking a Growler shot, Red woman does well (best of the lot) but Red bloke and Blue girl both need shooting. @Clive_ofthe_Kremlin we need your gun. Yes, YES!!

​

 

Quick quick @TIMMY WANNACOTT I've got a spare 30 seconds.

 

Yup, she certainly did!

 

I'm coming.....

 

I've a book and a half of green shield stamps....

 

aaaaand another evening on photoshop....

 

100%

 

missed the chance to go to the theatre last night with a possible chance to say hello to Christina. Seems the princess, Rosco and Serrell were doing their "audience with" tour thing about half an hour down the road. How did I miss that? MmmBop was originally on the bill too but has stood down for obvious reasons. By all accounts it's an excellent evening out.

 

MmmBop = H****n?

 

Indeed - for reference, one that didn't make my rather extensive record collection..

 

Just noticed today's episode continued the recent run of "one can't be ar5ed turning up to see how much they lose" episodes.

 

A McWitch Legacy Befuddle.
BBC approved preamble:
Oswestry 5
S46E05
https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b08d638b
The teams battle it out in the Shropshire border town of Oswestry. Anita Manning presents, with experts John Cameron and Thomas Plant on hand to help. Christina Trevanion is the auctioneer, and the fall of her gavel decides which team is victorious.

The Translation:
All I can do is give a flavour and waft of aroma about what apparently is going on. Hold on, what's that bad smell. It's McWitch false laughing her way through another episode at an Antiques Fair in Oswestry. She is the culinary equivalent of a 100 year old egg. Joining her will be Beef Wellington Bingo Cameron and stodgy school dinner Jam Roly Poly with lumpy custard Tubby Thomas. Wielding the gavel is beautifully light Golden Syrup pudding with Vanilla full cream Devonshire Custard, the Sponge Steamstress Princess Christina. Lets hope we conjure a Patrick Stewart Extras moment where we use the power of our minds to make her clothes fall off and we see everything.

​

The Staff:
[Gaffer] Anita Manning
[Red Team Expert] John Cameron
[Blue Team Expert] Thomas Forrester
[Auctioneer] Christina Trevanion
[Auction Location] Trevanion Auctioneers & Valuers, Whitchurch, Shropshire
[Miserlin Rating] Unlisted

The Teams:
[Red Team] Married couple Pax and Helena, let's see if they get well stuffed with profits, he is or was a bomber pilot, best not to mention the war.
[Blue Team] Engaged couple Charlotte and Ian who met in a Scousers bar, no doubt over overpriced lager and watered down gin followed by a big fight and stabbings outside. They sail on the River Mersey.

The Shopping:
Reds: Yoke, which might be on them (24) Princess loves it 20-30, Silver-mounted perfume bottle (79) ouch 30-50, Box of Kings pattern silver spoons (48) good 40-60.
Blues: Victorian cast-iron fireplace with a Georgian footman, incomplete (55) she's being mean 30-50, Charlotte Rhead Bursley Ware ceramic bowl (28) very pretty 30-50, Oriental silver coconut shell bowl (125) a nice mark on the bottom, yes you will have, 60-100.

The Distraction:
Anita shows why looking at the back of an object can provide information that adds value like the price tag. Evidently, the segment is called, Always look at the back. If it's spotless then it must belong to The Great Storyteller Jeffrey Archer. McWitch slurs and mangles here way through a piece on Wilfred Owen, POWs and how in a former life she was the Kommandant at Colditz Castle. Wokesfuhrer Weeks quiff automatically twitches and forms a swept forward style not too dissimilar to the owner of a certain postage stamp moustache. No. not Blakey, the other one, from Germany.

​

The Auction:
Reds: Yoke (16 profit), Silver-mounted perfume bottle (44 loss), Box of Kings pattern silver spoons (13 loss).
Bingo's BB is a Set of 6 Art Nouveau 1901 silver buttons (70), she loves them, they are always beautiful and always sought-after, she coos, yes you are, 60-100, 70. Wipes the face of the fairest maiden.
Blues: Victorian cast-iron fireplace with a Georgian footman, incomplete (5 loss), Charlotte Rhead Bursley Ware ceramic bowl (17 profit), Oriental silver coconut shell bowl (45 loss).
Tubby's BB is a Scary Little Black Forest carved inkwell, his team laugh, even McWitch is unsettled by it, he predicts it'll make hundreds (90), Christina bursts out laughing as it's so hideous 20-30 could be a horrendous loss, they REJECT with a big fat no, 60. A big fat Tubby Loss of 30.

The Aftermath:
Queen Christina banging the gavel is always a sight for sore eyes. Shame we can't view it and see everything. Bingo's Reds up first and get off to a great start with a profit on the Yoke, then it's as if they're wearing the Yoke with a large 44 loss on the perfume bottle followed by a sink to the knees with another loss for the set of spoons. His BB of Buttons makes its target bid quickly and it shoots it's bolt prematurely, well who wouldn't in front of the hostess with the mostess, and it's brake even time for Bingo's buttons and they finish 41 down. Then it was time for Tubby's Blues, did they get them those Blues? A small loss on a rusty fireplace followed by a ceramic profit. Reasonable going. Then it's yet another Tubby Big Spend disaster as his silver and coconut bowl, bought for 125, sinks like a lead weight, wiping out their profit with a 45 GBP loss. He really is rubbish. Then there was his BB which made everyone laugh as it was so hideous. An ugly wood carved inkwell which he bumptiously predicted would make a bundle. His Team disdainfully reject it, I so wish we could see how bad it was. It lost 30 justifying their decision to give it the flicked V-sign, and they win the contest with minus 33. If they had gone with it then they would have really got the Blues and sunk depressingly to defeat with an overall loss of 66. Tubby strikes again.

Reds -41
Blues -33 (-63 if they hadn't Rejected BB)

The Hi-Kick:
It involves McWitch who will barely try and will use her befuddle spell to cause chaos.

 

Helter Skelter

 

INDEED - THE MORE I STARE, THE MORE LIGHT-HEADED I FEEL.

 

Further to my post about missing an evening with Christina (and 2 old men) heres a link to the website detailing future shows. I believe they regularly update with new venues. By all accounts its an entertaining night out. https://antiquesontour.co.uk/

 

Yum, yum, yum.

 

Does everyone get theirs out too?

 

Christima expertly handling wood.

Grandmother and Granddaughter Reds.

Old biddy Blues.

Trilly and Madders.

Transgressor Auction.

Connection to flight/Connection to nature





Hunched up bugger.

Trilly silver brooch with butterfly wing. Deffo in her comfort zone.

Cake stand in the Georgian style. Victoria sponges in the Victorian style.

Does a C0ckk fly? Cockerel.

Rubbing wood along the notches to make a sound. Grunt.

Test those negotiating slills. "What's the Best?" She was obviously a Top Diplomat in the Foreign Office.

Red Granddaughter, potential Christie victim at the Auction. Just breathe in the gaaaasssssss my dear.

Not a Buy-Plane quips the Princess.

Poppadom Pickle Dishes.

RFC badge more collectible, surely.

 

Helmet-shaped creamer for @wfcmoogTrilly gives it a really good shake to make sure she gets double-cream.



Reds cackle like witches.

I like the fact that Trilly and Madders guide their teams and don't Gaslight them into purchases.

2 lots of Trilly silver.



Madders is going to find something pretty.

No need it's here already.

Is Christina going to be banging wood today?

Some of that blokes wood carvings are stunning.



Some great Dirty Laughing.

 

Christina is like a ray of sunshine in this drab, rainy day.

 

The Transgressors Parlour looks like Hansel and Gretel's House.



The iconic shape of the helmet creamer. Snigger.

Have you given the frog a kiss laughs Christina.

I haven't turned it into a Princess he says.

No need she's there already.

Gaaaaassshley will be kissing the frog later.

Trilly's Reds.

RFC brroch makes a loss.

Helmet time. Disappointing eruption. A loss.

The cat that got the cream says our Hostess.

The silver taster brings respectability to proceedings with a 30 profit.

Trilly BB to rescue things.

Nifty 1940s travelling clock. Nice. Very stylish. 20 notes. Bargain.

What does Christie say?

He loves the leather. His glasses steam up as he fantasises.

Wipes it's arse. Shame, it deserved better.

Overall -15.

Red Grandaughter actually has a cute smile.

Blues next.

Madders brooch makes 21 profit. Good start.

Froggy makes a profit as we know it wood, Arf arf. 18 profit.

GG on?

Piiinnn dissshhheeesssss he drawls.

39 loss. Golden Gavel falls down a hole.

Madders BB is a Vintage Australian Snapper Fishing Reel. Daft bint guffaws like the idiot she is. 40 notes. Aussie bidders?

That's a beast says Christie as he drops his trousers.

Very slow Auction.

Loses a tenner.

Hopeless Auction today.

Blues end up on -10.

 

Oh wow, she says, with cute nose wrinkle. She has all the moves.

 

I remember this 70s-tastic blonde. BB meets Babs meets Mary Hopkin with elements of Agnetha and the lead singer of Pussycat.
Erm, not that I've given it too much thought...

 

Christina mentions 'struggling'; Gasssley smiles, licks lips.

Some bad luck on a couple of these items.

What a tight finish!
Said the bishop to the actress

 

Christina gives us a fantastic Growler kick.

 

Poor Auctioneering. The Transgressor is so turgid at times. A lifeless Auction. Just how he likes them.

 

The mummified corpse of Anee Robinson, for sale, at Gaaassssshley's emporium.

 

Or darken the hair to get...